Advent is a season of waiting…expectantly awaiting the arrival of our Messiah and anticipating the celebration of His birth.
I'm sure it's different in many churches, and I'm not exactly sure when and where this tradition originated, but at our church we light a candle signifying a different aspect of Advent each of the four Sundays before Christmas:
Hope. Peace. Joy. Love.
One way the Lord has really blessed me lately is to allow my emotions and experiences to coincide with these four gifts from above that we celebrate throughout December.
Let me explain.
Hope.
We celebrated Hope on Dec. 1, the day before I went back to the consulate with the hope of acquiring a visa. This was the third and final shot. A long shot, to say the least. But we were hopeful. The appointment wasn't perfect…we waited for two hours, only to be told that they'd have to deliberate further and would email us if more information was required.
I went away a bit downcast and frustrated, honestly. To me, the situation was now hopeless. There was nothing further I, in my own wisdom, strength or power, could do to convince them I "deserved" or was qualified for this visa when they seemed to have decided otherwise. Christ alone could work a miracle to change hearts and minds. It was out of my hands, out of my control.
But I clung to the hope and assurance that He "is at God's right hand--with angels, authorities and powers in submission to him" (1 Peter 3:22). Even government workers.
The next week, I did pray for a miracle, but I also prayed for clarity about what to do if the door to Italy was closed and barred for good. Within that week, and really within the span of one day, a beautiful opportunity to be a traveling writer in Southeast Asia solidified. Suddenly, this possibility became real and exciting…I could visualize living there with friends I made during training and I was thrilled by the prospect of playing a small part in telling God's story of salvation in Asia.
That's where Peace came in.
By the following Sunday, on which we focused on Peace, God had granted me this incredible sense of spiritual tranquility. He had quieted my soul. I was willing and equally excited about either direction He would take me. Admittedly, Southeast Asia would be more unfamiliar and probably a rougher transition, after all this time preparing mentally, emotionally and logistically for Italy. But I surrendered Rome. I laid it down. I wanted God's will, whatever it was.
"Take my will and make it Thine…It shall be no longer mine."
So that's where I was. Ready to go either place, but just yearning and crying out, "Lord, send me! Please use me somewhere!" I was just so ready to go. Tired of waiting. In pain and struggling beneath the burden of uncertainly. Trusting, but soul-sick.
And then…
Joy.
Two days after our Joy Sunday, I got a phone call from my Logistics Coordinator. He'd gotten an email from the consulate that my visa was being "issued/shipped."
I was going to Italy.
Holy smokes! Is this real life?! I did nothing but wait for three weeks. I. Did. NOTHING. Which means, of course, that Christ alone gets the glory! He worked a miracle, and I still can't believe or understand it.
And now it really feels official! My visa came in the mail yesterday. The best Christmas gift I could ask for. Thanks, God :)
I just…I'm speechless. God is so sovereign and gracious and good. Nothing and no one can diminish His glory…"He WILL be exalted among the nations, He will be exalted in all the earth." And I can't wait to watch Him display His glory in Rome. Y'all…I get to see that. I'm overwhelmed. I can't wait. I'm amazed. I'm in love.
So, Love…
I love Jesus. I love all of you for reading these and praying for me and encouraging me when I felt like I just couldn't stand this ache anymore. I love Italians, even though I don't know that many yet. I pray that God would give me a love for everyone I encounter, that in doing so, they would be able "to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that [they] may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." (Ephesians 3:18-19)
After all, "The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." (Galatians 5:6)
So on this Christmas Eve, I pray you feel that love…that you would fully grasp and embrace the love poured out on all of us by our Father by sending His Son. That we could love like He did, laying down our very lives for the good of others. That we would be as selfless as our Savior. That we would be totally knocked on our butts by the immensity of His love for us…such imperfect, screwed up beings. That we could be changed by that love. That we would love others because of it.
We love because He first loved us.
So Merry Christmas! I love you all! Have a wonderful day celebrated what it's really about…Immanuel. God with us. I pray He'll be born in your heart today.
Oh yeah, and I don't have to start a new blog that doesn't say "Love from Rome." And soon I can legitimately say that!!!! :D
But until then, and probably this one last time…
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
Strengths & Weaknesses
I have a lot of thoughts.
So much so that I often have trouble deciding what to write for these things. Or rather I struggle staying focused on one thing and not spiderwebbing off in a million directions. Like I do in my brain.
But something I've been pondering a lot lately is the concept of strength and weakness. Usually strength versus weakness. Usually with strength being desirable and weakness having a negative connotation.
But that's not really realistic and it's not really biblical.
When strength is discussed in the Bible, it is more often the admission that our strength is not our own but only that which is imparted to us by our Almighty God. Here are some examples of what I mean…that I literally stumbled across this morning (isn't it great how God, quite literally, speaks to us through His word, even when we don't really have a clear idea of what it is we need to hear?):
"Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation." -Isaiah 12:2
"Why do you say, O Jacob, and complain, O Israel, 'My way is hidden from the Lord; my cause is disregarded by my God'? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." -Isaiah 40:27-29
That's really encouraging to me right now, because I feel so weak. And I am like doubting Israel, crying out to God, wondering if He's really got this under control. Wondering if He really does have an ultimate, glorious plan and this delayed departure for Italy or even my total reassignment to another country is really a part of it. Wondering why this is happening…what He's doing…if He cares…Wondering if He's forgotten about me…feeling disregarded and rejected.
Nope. Wrong.
Check this out:
"I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." -Isaiah 41:9-10
Boom.
Well said, God. You haven't forgotten about me. You haven't rejected me (even if the Italian government ultimately does). I'm still Your servant and You will still use me to do things I can only do through Your strength at work within me.
I know He's refining me throughout this waiting and disappointment, like gold and silver in the fire. And that refining fire isn't exactly a comfortable heating pad…seat warmer…hot tub… So many analogies. I cannot pick.
And let me pause there for a second…Disappointment. All disappointment is the result of unmet expectations. I'm disappointed because I expected to be in Italy with people I've already grown to love, using art as a ministry tool and sharing the love of Christ with people in the community. But I'm here. At home. Feeling useless and worthless and restless. Potentially missing out on beautiful opportunities right in front of me if I let myself slip into pity party territory.
Kind of like how many Jews totally missed out on the blessing and joy and wonder and salvation of Jesus Christ because they expected a different fulfillment of their prophesies. Even though He really does fulfill everything written about Him in the Old Testament, many religious leaders of His day expected Him to come in power and glory as a warrior king bent of vindication. Instead, He came as a baby born in a barn who became a carpenter that associated with thieves and prostitutes and entered their city riding on a donkey. He embodied truth and love, but He wasn't what they thought He would be. And they crucified Him for it.
Spiderweb. Back to strength and weakness.
Again, I feel really weak. But I do realize that I need that. I need to be broken. Of my pride and my self-reliance and my expectations and my determination to be in control. If there's one thing this whole visa application thing has taught me, it's that I truly have no control whatsoever. I am at the mercy of the authorities, but mostly of God (All angels, authorities and powers are in submission to Him, after all (1 Peter 3:22). So I am confident that if and when He sees fit to obliterate any barrier keeping me from where He wants me, He has the power to do so.).
So I'll close with this, because I feel like we can all relate to Paul here:
"To keep me from becoming conceited…there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties, for when I am weak, then I am strong." -2 Corinthians 12:7-10
So much so that I often have trouble deciding what to write for these things. Or rather I struggle staying focused on one thing and not spiderwebbing off in a million directions. Like I do in my brain.
But something I've been pondering a lot lately is the concept of strength and weakness. Usually strength versus weakness. Usually with strength being desirable and weakness having a negative connotation.
But that's not really realistic and it's not really biblical.
When strength is discussed in the Bible, it is more often the admission that our strength is not our own but only that which is imparted to us by our Almighty God. Here are some examples of what I mean…that I literally stumbled across this morning (isn't it great how God, quite literally, speaks to us through His word, even when we don't really have a clear idea of what it is we need to hear?):
"Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation." -Isaiah 12:2
"Why do you say, O Jacob, and complain, O Israel, 'My way is hidden from the Lord; my cause is disregarded by my God'? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." -Isaiah 40:27-29
That's really encouraging to me right now, because I feel so weak. And I am like doubting Israel, crying out to God, wondering if He's really got this under control. Wondering if He really does have an ultimate, glorious plan and this delayed departure for Italy or even my total reassignment to another country is really a part of it. Wondering why this is happening…what He's doing…if He cares…Wondering if He's forgotten about me…feeling disregarded and rejected.
Nope. Wrong.
Check this out:
"I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." -Isaiah 41:9-10
Boom.
Well said, God. You haven't forgotten about me. You haven't rejected me (even if the Italian government ultimately does). I'm still Your servant and You will still use me to do things I can only do through Your strength at work within me.
I know He's refining me throughout this waiting and disappointment, like gold and silver in the fire. And that refining fire isn't exactly a comfortable heating pad…seat warmer…hot tub… So many analogies. I cannot pick.
And let me pause there for a second…Disappointment. All disappointment is the result of unmet expectations. I'm disappointed because I expected to be in Italy with people I've already grown to love, using art as a ministry tool and sharing the love of Christ with people in the community. But I'm here. At home. Feeling useless and worthless and restless. Potentially missing out on beautiful opportunities right in front of me if I let myself slip into pity party territory.
Kind of like how many Jews totally missed out on the blessing and joy and wonder and salvation of Jesus Christ because they expected a different fulfillment of their prophesies. Even though He really does fulfill everything written about Him in the Old Testament, many religious leaders of His day expected Him to come in power and glory as a warrior king bent of vindication. Instead, He came as a baby born in a barn who became a carpenter that associated with thieves and prostitutes and entered their city riding on a donkey. He embodied truth and love, but He wasn't what they thought He would be. And they crucified Him for it.
Spiderweb. Back to strength and weakness.
Again, I feel really weak. But I do realize that I need that. I need to be broken. Of my pride and my self-reliance and my expectations and my determination to be in control. If there's one thing this whole visa application thing has taught me, it's that I truly have no control whatsoever. I am at the mercy of the authorities, but mostly of God (All angels, authorities and powers are in submission to Him, after all (1 Peter 3:22). So I am confident that if and when He sees fit to obliterate any barrier keeping me from where He wants me, He has the power to do so.).
So I'll close with this, because I feel like we can all relate to Paul here:
"To keep me from becoming conceited…there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties, for when I am weak, then I am strong." -2 Corinthians 12:7-10
Thursday, October 17, 2013
The Christ Figure
I remember learning about the Christ figure in English classes. A relatively common literary technique, a Christ figure is a character who shares obvious similarities with Jesus. Normally, he or she is a "savior" type figure, often sacrificing his or her life for the greater good and sometimes, like Christ, is marvelously and miraculously resurrected.
One of the most famous (and perhaps most intentional, as far as the author was concerned) is Aslan in C.S. Lewis's The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Narnia's fierce yet gentle lion-king did not have to die. He willingly took Edmund's place...He saved his life. And in his power, he came back to life to defeat the evil queen once and for all.
Kind of like how Christ died in our place, even though we could never deserve such an extravagant gift of grace. Kind of like how he conquered death, Hell and the grave. He has won the war against evil.
Even the show with which I've been pretty obsessed for the past couple of years has (however perhaps inadvertent or unplanned) biblical parallels. This may be a stretch, but Once Upon a Time hinges on the actions of "the savior" and stresses the importance of being "a believer." Emma's son even sacrificed himself in the first season so that the curse would be broken and all the characters would believe the truth.
Another huge one is Harry Potter. I'll argue with anyone who says is just a bunch of satanic mumbo-jumbo because it's about witchcraft.
Now, I really don't know if J.K. Rowling is a Believer or if she has ever read the Bible. But Harry Potter is a Christ figure. And Voldemort (Hello!! He looks like a snake, has a pet snake, can speak a hissing snake language...remember the Garden of Eden??) is a Satan-like figure. He is the epitome of evil and darkness. And Harry, "the Chosen One," was prophetically destined to defeat him. And by what drastic measure must that happen?
(SPOILER ALERT!!!) His own sacrificial death.
Harry willingly walks right up to Voldemort, allowing himself to be murdered so that no more of the good guys would have to die. And what's more, he didn't stay dead, leaving the rest to defeat the bad guys. He came back to life and personal vanquished Voldemort.
Call me a nerd if you want to. I will always love Harry Potter.
But none of these stories...none of these Christ figures measures up to our Jesus. To what really happened. To what he truly did for us on that cross.
I watched The Passion of the Christ for the first time the other day, and I was an emotional wreck for two solid hours. And the conviction of my inadequacy and wretchedness and the extremity of His sacrifice hit me like a brick wall.
Oh, the love. That He would willingly give His life for mine.
And have you seen that movie?? It's basically two hours of torture. And with every crack of a whip and every blow that drew blood, I thought...that was for me. I deserve that.
"It was my sin that held him there...until it was accomplished..."
How deep the Father's love for us, indeed.
But He who knew no sin voluntarily took the beating and the brutal death for my sake. For your sake.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he would lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13
And then..."Bursting forth in glorious day, up from the grave He rose again!"
And that is why we have hope. Therein lies our salvation. In His power and His glory He didn't stay dead but did what no one else could have done: Shouldering the weight of the world and the sins of all mankind, He rose again and assumed His rightful place at the right-hand of the Father. And He's up there still. On His throne. The Living God who also lives in the heart of every Believer.
Man. That's good stuff.
"Oh, how I love Jesus...because He first loved me."
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Ladies in Waiting & Warrior Princesses
God has truly (and graciously) been teaching me so much about waiting, and I know He's not finished yet. Waiting has been and still is the theme of my life and of the lives of so many other people I know and love this year. Waiting for answers. Waiting for clarity. Waiting for decisions. Waiting for things to happen.
Waiting on the Lord.
"But those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." -Isaiah 40:31
Other translations say "hope" and "trust" instead of wait. Man, is that encouraging. We can trust Him. He is our hope. As believers, that's what we claim, right? Then why is it so hard to wait for Him?
We want instant gratification. We want what we think we need or deserve or are entitled to right now. We anticipate and want and hope for what we do not (yet) possess...even to the point of aching for that thing or person or, in my case, country and people group. And it's scary because it's unclear when we might see our hopes fulfilled. We can't predict the future. Our hope is unseen.
"But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently." -Romans 8:24-25
In the same way, "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" (Hebrews 11:1). So keep the Faith. Don't give up hope. Don't become so exhausted by what you've set out to do that you give up on doing the good He called you to do.
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." -Galatians 6:9
Wow. I'm claiming that for myself as I pray for peace and entreat my soul to be still and attempt to take every thought captive for Christ as I wait for Him to make a way for me to go and do what I believe He has called me to do.
Just because it's hard doesn't mean it's not His will. In fact, it may be further evidence that it is. And that Somebody is trying to keep me from it.
In this matter (and all others!) I want to pray like this:
"The Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will." -Romans 8:26-27
Thank God I have His Holy Spirit living in me! Living in spite of me and even instead of me. After all, "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me" (Galatians 2:20).
And so I wait. And I beg for Jesus to be what sustains me. What fills me up. What drives me on.
As David Crowder would say, "He is jealous for me..." He wants to be my one and only love...not going to Italy. Not working in an art gallery. Not even loving people. He wants and needs (for my sake) to be my first and foremost. My one and only.
I need to have an undivided heart.
And oh, has He been faithful to draw me closer to Himself during this waiting period. I'm falling more in love with Him every day.
But while I do feel like a "Lady in Waiting," I also feel like a "Warrior Princess."
My mom called me that today, because she knows what I and our family and our church have been going through. At first I laughed. But then...you know what? Isn't that what we're called to be? We are children of the King and we are compelled to fight the powers of spiritual darkness that are (very evidently) alive and well.
No joke.
While I am waiting and trying to be patient and trust the Lord's timing, I am also not blind to the evil attacks that come up when we strive to serve Him.
Satan is just plain mean.
He tells you lies and he makes you doubt and he does his darnedest to prevent you from doing good. He will try to make you numb and complacent and dead, first of all. He likes you that way. But if you become a threat, he'll do whatever he can to keep you from following Christ's leadership. He'll try to push and shove and kick you off that path.
But remember..."Do not become weary to doing good..."
Also, when you feel like you're under attack (and even when you're not, for heaven's sake be proactive!), meditate on Ephesians 6:
"Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints."
Protect yourself against lies and unrighteousness and doubt and fear. Guard your heart against such things. Be alert to their presence in this dark world and pray...be in constant communication with the Commander. Then go. Fight back and run ahead, driven on by your confidence in the true word of God and by your conviction of the urgency and necessity and pleasure of proclaiming the gospel of peace.
So, while I'm still here...
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
Waiting on the Lord.
"But those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." -Isaiah 40:31
Other translations say "hope" and "trust" instead of wait. Man, is that encouraging. We can trust Him. He is our hope. As believers, that's what we claim, right? Then why is it so hard to wait for Him?
We want instant gratification. We want what we think we need or deserve or are entitled to right now. We anticipate and want and hope for what we do not (yet) possess...even to the point of aching for that thing or person or, in my case, country and people group. And it's scary because it's unclear when we might see our hopes fulfilled. We can't predict the future. Our hope is unseen.
"But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently." -Romans 8:24-25
In the same way, "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" (Hebrews 11:1). So keep the Faith. Don't give up hope. Don't become so exhausted by what you've set out to do that you give up on doing the good He called you to do.
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." -Galatians 6:9
Wow. I'm claiming that for myself as I pray for peace and entreat my soul to be still and attempt to take every thought captive for Christ as I wait for Him to make a way for me to go and do what I believe He has called me to do.
Just because it's hard doesn't mean it's not His will. In fact, it may be further evidence that it is. And that Somebody is trying to keep me from it.
In this matter (and all others!) I want to pray like this:
"The Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will." -Romans 8:26-27
Thank God I have His Holy Spirit living in me! Living in spite of me and even instead of me. After all, "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me" (Galatians 2:20).
And so I wait. And I beg for Jesus to be what sustains me. What fills me up. What drives me on.
As David Crowder would say, "He is jealous for me..." He wants to be my one and only love...not going to Italy. Not working in an art gallery. Not even loving people. He wants and needs (for my sake) to be my first and foremost. My one and only.
I need to have an undivided heart.
And oh, has He been faithful to draw me closer to Himself during this waiting period. I'm falling more in love with Him every day.
But while I do feel like a "Lady in Waiting," I also feel like a "Warrior Princess."
My mom called me that today, because she knows what I and our family and our church have been going through. At first I laughed. But then...you know what? Isn't that what we're called to be? We are children of the King and we are compelled to fight the powers of spiritual darkness that are (very evidently) alive and well.
No joke.
While I am waiting and trying to be patient and trust the Lord's timing, I am also not blind to the evil attacks that come up when we strive to serve Him.
Satan is just plain mean.
He tells you lies and he makes you doubt and he does his darnedest to prevent you from doing good. He will try to make you numb and complacent and dead, first of all. He likes you that way. But if you become a threat, he'll do whatever he can to keep you from following Christ's leadership. He'll try to push and shove and kick you off that path.
But remember..."Do not become weary to doing good..."
Also, when you feel like you're under attack (and even when you're not, for heaven's sake be proactive!), meditate on Ephesians 6:
"Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints."
Protect yourself against lies and unrighteousness and doubt and fear. Guard your heart against such things. Be alert to their presence in this dark world and pray...be in constant communication with the Commander. Then go. Fight back and run ahead, driven on by your confidence in the true word of God and by your conviction of the urgency and necessity and pleasure of proclaiming the gospel of peace.
So, while I'm still here...
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Perfect Timing
"Do not be anxious in anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." -Philippians 4:6-7
Lord, I'm trying not be be worried, anxious or upset by the rejection of my second visa application. Like the bold friend in Luke 11 and the persistent widow in Luke 18, I will keep knocking. I will keep praying and petitioning and begging for this document that will allow me to live in Italy for more than 90 days. But above all else, I beg for your will to be done. God, whatever happens, you are good and glorious and sovereign and holy. You know the number of my days and every hair on my head and you have carried me all my life. I know you are faithful.
I don't know why I've been applying for this visa for a solid two months. I don't know if this means "wait" or "stop" or "go somewhere else." All I know is that few things in my life have felt as right or clear as being assigned to Italy. I just feel an almost surreal peace about it. An excitement for it. Is that wrong? If God wants me somewhere else, I will go. But where? People need Jesus everywhere. I know that. I believe that. But I also believe that God prepares our hearts to live and serve where He wants us, according to His plan and His will. I refuse to doubt His leadership and His guidance and the good work He has been doing in my life.
"...being confident in this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." -Philippians 1:6
After getting my application back in the mail yesterday and talking to my logistics coordinator and being a bit downcast and praying, God was so sweet and tender in bringing so many promises from His Word to mind. So here's what I prayer journaled last night:
Dear Lord,
"I am still confident in this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. WAIT FOR THE LORD. Be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord" (Psalm 27). Lord, whatever comes my way, I will trust you. I will wait for your signal, for your timing. I do feel discouraged and disappointed and sad and scared that my visa application was rejected again. I'm afraid of being reassigned. I love my team already and I love the idea of getting to use art to share your love with Italians.
Do you not want me there? No. It isn't fair for me to doubt your love and your faithfulness and your calling. "Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go" (Joshua 1:9). I know that's true. You are with your people. You live inside me. I want to abide in you. Deeply. And even though it is hard in the midst of uncertainty, "I sing in the shadow of your wings." (Go read all of Psalm 63. Right now!!) Oh Lord, my body does thirst for you and my soul longs for you. I just want more of you. I'm sorry for getting caught up in praising an assignment in a country more than you, the Author and Perfecter of my faith.
But now what would you have me do? "Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul...Teach me your will for you are my God; may your good spirit lead me on level ground" (Psalm 143).
I know how intimately you know me. "Search me, Oh God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts" (Psalm 139).
You have, and rightly so, been humbling me these last two months. "Humble yourselves under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you" (1 Peter 5). Humble me Lord. And please take my cares and fears and anxieties. Take them. Please take them away. Take this visa. It's yours. I give it to you. Take my life, my will, my plans, everything.
Please, Lord, tell me what to do next. "Teach me your way, Oh Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me and undivided heart that I may fear your name" (Psalm 86). Show me your way and your will and help me love you more exclusively. Rid me of myself and my pride.
Help me rest in this command and promise: "Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in all the earth" (Psalm 46:10)
I pray for each of you reading this as well...that whatever you are anxious about and whatever you are waiting for...that you would turn it over to Him. I promise my God is big enough and omniscient and wise and sovereign enough to handle it, according to HIS will.
"Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life" (Philippians 4:6-7, The Message).
Lord, I'm trying not be be worried, anxious or upset by the rejection of my second visa application. Like the bold friend in Luke 11 and the persistent widow in Luke 18, I will keep knocking. I will keep praying and petitioning and begging for this document that will allow me to live in Italy for more than 90 days. But above all else, I beg for your will to be done. God, whatever happens, you are good and glorious and sovereign and holy. You know the number of my days and every hair on my head and you have carried me all my life. I know you are faithful.
I don't know why I've been applying for this visa for a solid two months. I don't know if this means "wait" or "stop" or "go somewhere else." All I know is that few things in my life have felt as right or clear as being assigned to Italy. I just feel an almost surreal peace about it. An excitement for it. Is that wrong? If God wants me somewhere else, I will go. But where? People need Jesus everywhere. I know that. I believe that. But I also believe that God prepares our hearts to live and serve where He wants us, according to His plan and His will. I refuse to doubt His leadership and His guidance and the good work He has been doing in my life.
"...being confident in this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." -Philippians 1:6
After getting my application back in the mail yesterday and talking to my logistics coordinator and being a bit downcast and praying, God was so sweet and tender in bringing so many promises from His Word to mind. So here's what I prayer journaled last night:
Dear Lord,
"I am still confident in this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. WAIT FOR THE LORD. Be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord" (Psalm 27). Lord, whatever comes my way, I will trust you. I will wait for your signal, for your timing. I do feel discouraged and disappointed and sad and scared that my visa application was rejected again. I'm afraid of being reassigned. I love my team already and I love the idea of getting to use art to share your love with Italians.
Do you not want me there? No. It isn't fair for me to doubt your love and your faithfulness and your calling. "Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go" (Joshua 1:9). I know that's true. You are with your people. You live inside me. I want to abide in you. Deeply. And even though it is hard in the midst of uncertainty, "I sing in the shadow of your wings." (Go read all of Psalm 63. Right now!!) Oh Lord, my body does thirst for you and my soul longs for you. I just want more of you. I'm sorry for getting caught up in praising an assignment in a country more than you, the Author and Perfecter of my faith.
But now what would you have me do? "Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul...Teach me your will for you are my God; may your good spirit lead me on level ground" (Psalm 143).
I know how intimately you know me. "Search me, Oh God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts" (Psalm 139).
You have, and rightly so, been humbling me these last two months. "Humble yourselves under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you" (1 Peter 5). Humble me Lord. And please take my cares and fears and anxieties. Take them. Please take them away. Take this visa. It's yours. I give it to you. Take my life, my will, my plans, everything.
Please, Lord, tell me what to do next. "Teach me your way, Oh Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me and undivided heart that I may fear your name" (Psalm 86). Show me your way and your will and help me love you more exclusively. Rid me of myself and my pride.
Help me rest in this command and promise: "Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in all the earth" (Psalm 46:10)
I pray for each of you reading this as well...that whatever you are anxious about and whatever you are waiting for...that you would turn it over to Him. I promise my God is big enough and omniscient and wise and sovereign enough to handle it, according to HIS will.
"Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life" (Philippians 4:6-7, The Message).
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Insights in Exodus
Being the cool kids that we are, a group of us watched The Prince of Egypt the other night. I've seen it plenty of times and have always been impressed with the music and animation. But it was wonderful to watch it with a few of my fellow believers and truly be in awe of the great I AM.
I mean really...can you imagine? The risk and heartache Moses' mother had to endure to save her baby's life. How Moses must have felt when he realized he wasn't really an Egyptian prince but an Israelite slave. What it must have been like to see a bush on fire but not burning away and hear the audible voice of God emanating from it. To see the wonder and power and devastation of the plagues. And of course, my favorite part, getting to walk straight through the parted waters of the Red Sea on dry land...the most enormous aquarium ever!
It shows so much about faith.
Although Moses had a lot of it, he faltered and doubted and evaded God's plan and provision.
"O Lord, I have never been eloquent...I am slow of speech and tongue...please send someone else to do it." (Exodus 4:10, 13)
And those Israelites. I mean how many miracles did they have to see before they trusted Him fully??
But how hypocritical of me...If we're honest with ourselves, aren't we all that way? How many times have we enjoyed God's blessings and seen His leadership in our lives and witnessed His Providence and realized how He has rescued us from circumstances or from ourselves? Yet we are still so slow to believe...with faith even smaller than a mustard seed.
I'm like the father in Mark 9 who, when Jesus comes to rid his son of the evil spirit, says, "I do believe! Help me overcome my unbelief!"
I'd like to believe if I saw all that the Israelites and Egyptians witnessed in Exodus, I would never be able to doubt the miraculous power and sovereignty of my God. But even being eyewitnesses didn't seal their faith or ensure their faithfulness thereafter.
But I need to just open my eyes to the miracles He's worked in my life and in the lives of those around me. He is still moving and working in mighty ways. He's not confined to our inerrant, centuries-old Book, although it is His Word to us. He is a living God who is mighty to save (Zephaniah 3:17).
And what was true in Moses' day is still true now. He cares for us and He will be with us (Exodus 3). He will fight for us.
"The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." (Exodus 14:14)
I mean really...can you imagine? The risk and heartache Moses' mother had to endure to save her baby's life. How Moses must have felt when he realized he wasn't really an Egyptian prince but an Israelite slave. What it must have been like to see a bush on fire but not burning away and hear the audible voice of God emanating from it. To see the wonder and power and devastation of the plagues. And of course, my favorite part, getting to walk straight through the parted waters of the Red Sea on dry land...the most enormous aquarium ever!
It shows so much about faith.
Although Moses had a lot of it, he faltered and doubted and evaded God's plan and provision.
"O Lord, I have never been eloquent...I am slow of speech and tongue...please send someone else to do it." (Exodus 4:10, 13)
And those Israelites. I mean how many miracles did they have to see before they trusted Him fully??
But how hypocritical of me...If we're honest with ourselves, aren't we all that way? How many times have we enjoyed God's blessings and seen His leadership in our lives and witnessed His Providence and realized how He has rescued us from circumstances or from ourselves? Yet we are still so slow to believe...with faith even smaller than a mustard seed.
I'm like the father in Mark 9 who, when Jesus comes to rid his son of the evil spirit, says, "I do believe! Help me overcome my unbelief!"
I'd like to believe if I saw all that the Israelites and Egyptians witnessed in Exodus, I would never be able to doubt the miraculous power and sovereignty of my God. But even being eyewitnesses didn't seal their faith or ensure their faithfulness thereafter.
But I need to just open my eyes to the miracles He's worked in my life and in the lives of those around me. He is still moving and working in mighty ways. He's not confined to our inerrant, centuries-old Book, although it is His Word to us. He is a living God who is mighty to save (Zephaniah 3:17).
And what was true in Moses' day is still true now. He cares for us and He will be with us (Exodus 3). He will fight for us.
"The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." (Exodus 14:14)
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Being Mary in a Martha World
In all the spiritual highs and lows of the past couple of weeks, if there's one thing I've been personally impressed with and convicted of, it's the fact that I simply do not adore my Savior as much as He deserves.
I don't spend enough quality time with Him. I'm not a good enough listener. I too seldom fall on my face in overwhelming, reverent gratitude for this Person who literally sacrificed Himself for me.
I'm guilty of having a heart divided.
"Teach me your may, O Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart that I may fear your name." Psalm 86:11
Oh man. Is that ever my prayer.
I want to be like the woman (whose story is told in Matthew, Mark, Luke AND John) who was so aware of her desperate need for Jesus that she honored him with perfume she could probably barely afford and knelt at His feet, washing them with her tears. I am that sinful. We are that sinful. But how often do we have the humility to kneel before Him and, weeping, give Him everything we have?
I want to be like Mary, even though I innately tend towards being Martha. In Luke 10, when Jesus visits these sisters, Mary sits and listens intently to what He says. Martha, on the other hand, is the type-A go-getter who is "distracted by all the preparations that had to be made."
That's me. Constantly distracted. And not always by bad things. By people. By being social. By my easily derailed train of thought. By remembering the past or wondering about the future. By all the things on my to-do list!
But Jesus told Martha, "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken from her."
I want to be Mary. Like her, I want to just BE with Jesus.
Thank you all for your faithful support and prayers during this time! The encouraging texts, Facebook messages, etc. have meant so much!!!
With Love,
Elizabeth
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Kids Say the Darndest Things
They really do. Kids make me laugh. You never know what's going to come out of their mouths.
So of course, I was thoroughly entertained last week during VBS. My grandma and I taught the group that just finished Kindergarten (She's a retired Kindergarten teacher. She rocks), and, as I do every year, I fell in love with our kids and they definitely made me laugh. A lot.
Ever notice how many questions kids ask? One of my favorites was when a little girl asked me why I wear makeup and one of our most precocious boys threw his hands in the air and hollered, "BECAUSE SHE'S A LADY!!!" This was the same boy who had a lot to say about my being gone for two years..."When you get back, we'll be 8 years old! ...In two years...YOU'LL BE MARRIED!!" (No, child. It doesn't quite work that way.)
And, as in most every life experience, I learned some things from them too.
Because VBS this year had a medieval, "Armor of God" theme, we played dress up a lot. One day I put on one of my old dance costumes and a crown and had all the kids convinced I was a princess. I whispered to one kid (the boy I just told you about) that my father was a King, but not to tell anyone. So of course, he starts running around the room and telling everyone just that.
That reminded me of something that's always kind of interested/confused me...Have you ever noticed how in the gospels, Jesus is always telling people not to tell anyone about Him? To keep quiet about Him being the Son of God? I've reasoned that it's because He knew it wasn't the time for everyone to know and that such talk could have gotten Him arrested before the proper time. But I think there's another reason as well...Every time He warned a person not to tell anyone about Him, that person usually went right ahead and did it anyway. Perhaps even with more adamancy and spiritual fervor than if He had told them to do it.
So maybe Jesus was playing on out child-like tendency to do the opposite of what we're told. And doesn't news sort of seem to spread faster when it's supposed to be a secret?
Jesus also said, "Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” (Mark 10:15)
The crazy thing about the kids in my class is that they actually believed me. They just had faith. And another characteristic of kids that we need to imitate: they just want to be loved. They want to be held and cuddled and told they're beautiful and good.
To enter the Kingdom, we really do need to shed a little of ourselves and our pride. We need to crawl into His lap and stare up at Him in wonder and love, desiring His blessing on our lives and having faith in HIm in all things. Like a little child, we need to snuggle into to the warm embrace of our Daddy, trusting Him to protect and love us unconditionally and sacrificially.
On another note, please keep my visa application in your prayers!
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
So of course, I was thoroughly entertained last week during VBS. My grandma and I taught the group that just finished Kindergarten (She's a retired Kindergarten teacher. She rocks), and, as I do every year, I fell in love with our kids and they definitely made me laugh. A lot.
Ever notice how many questions kids ask? One of my favorites was when a little girl asked me why I wear makeup and one of our most precocious boys threw his hands in the air and hollered, "BECAUSE SHE'S A LADY!!!" This was the same boy who had a lot to say about my being gone for two years..."When you get back, we'll be 8 years old! ...In two years...YOU'LL BE MARRIED!!" (No, child. It doesn't quite work that way.)
And, as in most every life experience, I learned some things from them too.
Because VBS this year had a medieval, "Armor of God" theme, we played dress up a lot. One day I put on one of my old dance costumes and a crown and had all the kids convinced I was a princess. I whispered to one kid (the boy I just told you about) that my father was a King, but not to tell anyone. So of course, he starts running around the room and telling everyone just that.
That reminded me of something that's always kind of interested/confused me...Have you ever noticed how in the gospels, Jesus is always telling people not to tell anyone about Him? To keep quiet about Him being the Son of God? I've reasoned that it's because He knew it wasn't the time for everyone to know and that such talk could have gotten Him arrested before the proper time. But I think there's another reason as well...Every time He warned a person not to tell anyone about Him, that person usually went right ahead and did it anyway. Perhaps even with more adamancy and spiritual fervor than if He had told them to do it.
So maybe Jesus was playing on out child-like tendency to do the opposite of what we're told. And doesn't news sort of seem to spread faster when it's supposed to be a secret?
Jesus also said, "Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” (Mark 10:15)
The crazy thing about the kids in my class is that they actually believed me. They just had faith. And another characteristic of kids that we need to imitate: they just want to be loved. They want to be held and cuddled and told they're beautiful and good.
To enter the Kingdom, we really do need to shed a little of ourselves and our pride. We need to crawl into His lap and stare up at Him in wonder and love, desiring His blessing on our lives and having faith in HIm in all things. Like a little child, we need to snuggle into to the warm embrace of our Daddy, trusting Him to protect and love us unconditionally and sacrificially.
On another note, please keep my visa application in your prayers!
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Love Language Fluency
No? You really should.
There's one for married couples concerning how to love your spouse well, but I read his Singles' Edition. Loved it. Yes, being able to speak my (God willing) husband's love language well will be very important some day. But we need to love EVERYONE well...parents, siblings, co-workers, roommates, friends.
I often fall short of loving people well in the way they best receive love. But I want to! And--as hippie as this sounds--wouldn't the world be a better place if we all just tried to love each other better? After all, Jesus was all about the love...In Matthew 22, He says the greatest commandment is to "love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
And Paul echoes that. A lot.
"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:9-10
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." 1 Corinthians 13
"The entire law is summed up in a single command: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" Galatians 5:14
So yeah. Love.
I've done the little Love Language Inventory thing a couple of times (http://www.5lovelanguages.com...DO IT!) and both times showed how much I really enjoy Quality Time (closely followed by Words of Affirmation).
That being said, I have been so incredibly blessed by the amount of quality time I've spend with friends these past couple of weeks, especially on my little road trip (we'll call it my "Farewell Tour"). I had a wonderful trip, spending time with my lovelies in Atlanta, Birmingham and Nashville--most of whom I hadn't seen since graduation (a whole year?! TOO. LONG.)
I'm so thankful for the countless hours of meaningful conversations, endless hugs, and just plain old good times with so many people. It made the fact that I'm leaving soon so much more vividly real.
It's hard to say goodbye for two years to the many people I love, but I'm excited to meet the people I'll grow to love in the future. I wonder what their love languages will be...
Until next time!
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
Monday, May 13, 2013
And so it begins...
Welcome to my blog!
If you're wondering about the domain name, this is how I'd like to send you all "Love from Rome" while I'm over there.
For those of you who don't know, I'm going to be spending the next two years in this gorgeous, ancient city working in an art gallery, teaching English and helping with a church plant. I am astounded at God's providence and leadership and His goodness in that He has been uniquely crafting my passions and talents all my life to lead me to serve Him in such a way and in such a place. As a Fine Arts major, I have studied and fallen in love with Italy for the past four years of college! I'm thrilled to have the opportunity to create and discuss art while loving people in this exciting city!
If you're wondering about the blog title, I chose it because we are told to "always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have" (1 Peter 3:15)...it is the reason we go...the reason we serve...the reason we love...
Because He first loved us.
Take a look at 1 John 4:7-21:
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. This is how we know that we live in him and he in us: He has given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.
This is our calling. Our divine privilege and purpose. To love others as ourselves.
We, as followers of Christ, are called to do this anywhere and everywhere. For the next two years, I'll be doing it thousands of miles and several time zones away from home.
Why am I doing it?
Because He first loved me.
Thank you for choosing to keep up with me this way! Even though I don't head overseas until fall, I wanted to get this blog underway. I hope whatever I have to say will be worth reading. And I don't want this to be about my life so much as what my Father is doing in, through and with it. I can't WAIT to see just what He's going to do!
So, until I leave...
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
If you're wondering about the domain name, this is how I'd like to send you all "Love from Rome" while I'm over there.
For those of you who don't know, I'm going to be spending the next two years in this gorgeous, ancient city working in an art gallery, teaching English and helping with a church plant. I am astounded at God's providence and leadership and His goodness in that He has been uniquely crafting my passions and talents all my life to lead me to serve Him in such a way and in such a place. As a Fine Arts major, I have studied and fallen in love with Italy for the past four years of college! I'm thrilled to have the opportunity to create and discuss art while loving people in this exciting city!
If you're wondering about the blog title, I chose it because we are told to "always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have" (1 Peter 3:15)...it is the reason we go...the reason we serve...the reason we love...
Because He first loved us.
Take a look at 1 John 4:7-21:
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. This is how we know that we live in him and he in us: He has given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.
This is our calling. Our divine privilege and purpose. To love others as ourselves.
We, as followers of Christ, are called to do this anywhere and everywhere. For the next two years, I'll be doing it thousands of miles and several time zones away from home.
Why am I doing it?
Because He first loved me.
Thank you for choosing to keep up with me this way! Even though I don't head overseas until fall, I wanted to get this blog underway. I hope whatever I have to say will be worth reading. And I don't want this to be about my life so much as what my Father is doing in, through and with it. I can't WAIT to see just what He's going to do!
So, until I leave...
Love from Home,
Elizabeth
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